Thursday, July 16, 2015

Matter over mind

Image compliments of McGill Packlab
I'm enjoying my lunch.  Wait... am I?

As I packed up the leftovers from dinner last night, I thought, "Hmmm... this might make a good lunch."  Then I picked up the tupperware this morning to find that the "mice" (dear husband) had gotten to it in the night, and there was half as much as was there last night.

I had a sinking feeling this morning that, "It wouldn't be enough."  

One chicken thigh and a cup of sauteed cauliflower.  I threw in some lettuce greens and headed to work.

On my way back to the office from an appointment, I had to resist the urge to get a small soup (ooh - white bean soup - protein - it will be perfect.  It will make my lunch an appropriate amount).

I force myself to slow down and enjoy the food, because if I don't, it will be gone before I know it, and I will be sad.

Instead of bemoaning the "too small" amount of food, I take smaller bites.  I imagine how one chicken thigh could be 30 bites, or 10 bites.  I take breaks.  I chew completely and swallow before having more.

And somewhere along the way I realize, this is just right.  This is just the amount my body needs, not too little at all.

I wonder for how many years (and pounds) thoughts about my body:

  • I'll be hungry later.
  • I need more protein.
  • This isn't enough food.

have been taking the place of the TRUE needs of my mind:

  • I need more relief.
  • I need more downtime.
  • This isn't enough self-care.

Because with a SLOWER, smaller lunch... there actually seems to be no downside.  Matter is satisfied.  It's the mind that needs to be understood, soothed, and given times of rest.

Tuesday, July 7, 2015

Take a break (for goodness' sake!)

Thanks to Rev. Dr. Michael Bernard Beckwith at for the inspiration for this technique!

Saturday, July 4, 2015

Three tips to fall asleep and stay asleep

Three tips to fall asleep and stay asleep with yoga breathing in bed in under two minutes!  Enjoy!

Tuesday, June 30, 2015

When it seems like nothing is changing

Image compliments of Everyday Goddess on Pinterest
Currently, I'm manifesting:
- A 100 lb weight loss
- Self-employment as a Yoga Therapist
- Happiness (relief from depression)

Whew!  That's a lot to work toward!  For more on manifesting, go here: Abraham-Hicks

Sometimes it looks like nothing is happening.

I recently purchased a manifesting course from Lucky Bitch by Denise Duffield-Thomas.  So many wonderful things have come from learning with and from Denise.  Firstly, I learned the importance of decluttering as a first step in manifesting.  This makes a ton of sense!  You have to free up bandwidth for the new energy/stuff/habits to have room to grow.  So we have begun a house over-haul... cleaning out closets, rooms, setting up exercise equipment, and generally getting rid of things that don't "spark joy".  (Learn more about the Konmari method in this great video: Lavendaire on Youtube).

Part of decluttering, Denise Duffield-Thomas points out, is decluttering our emotions, beliefs, and relationships.  I am a huge believer in therapy repairing and healing relationships, and I'll leave that there without getting too personal.  She asks us to take part in an inner child meditation that had me bawling... as I brought smaller versions of myself into a room and gave them kindness and love.  I am now practicing offering love and care to many versions of myself.  I have pictures of myself at many ages and am working through some exercises in The Inner Child Workbook by Cathryn Taylor using these pictures of myself from when I was younger.

Also, from Lucky Bitch by Denise Duffield-Thomas's course, I have reconnected with the importance of affirmations said with feeling and gusto.  I've also learned some great affirmations from Sondra Ray's The Only Diet There Is.

- I deserve to maintain my ideal and perfect weight of 142 pounds.
- It's my time.  I'm ready for the next step.
- I am calm and peaceful.

So as I work all these bits and pieces, when I have time, and build trust and calmness within... what is changing?  So far, it's not my weight.  I haven't weighed in in a while but last I checked, though my clothes are fitting differently, and I'm eating differently, I'm not seeing what I'd like on the scale.  YET!!  Something so big is happening and changing and I feel and I trust it.

I do feel a greater sense of joy and happiness as I unlock this dam of inner love for myself.  As I love myself more, and turn more over to God (as I understand them - more on this later), I'm feeling spacious and peaceful.

I'm able to leave some food on my plate at every meal if I choose.  And, I'm halfway through recording many videos for my video course coming out at the end of the year.  I can't wait to help others, as I've helped myself.

So I hope you enjoy this resource-oriented post and can find something that resonates with you, and inspires you.

Thursday, June 25, 2015

My fat told me it would make me famous

Image compliments of

In the book A Course in Weight Loss by Marianne Williamson, the second exercise is to write a letter to your fat, and to write a letter back.  It's called "Thin you, meet not thin you."  Here's an excerpt:
Any reaction to your not-thin self that is based on fear - judgment, attack, self-criticism, self-loathing - will only keep your excess weight in place.  If the miracle you are seeking is the removal of excess weight, then learning to love all aspects of yourself - even her - is your liberation.
As counterintuitive as it sounds, it is your learning to love Not-Thin You that will cause this aspect of yourself to disappear.  She didn't ask to be here; she isn't comfortable here; she was summoned up, and summoned up by you.  As you make her your ally rather than your enemy, she will disappear into the light of your true being.  She is quite literally a manifestation of a ghost, a mere twisted thought given form by your subconscious mind.  But before [the force of] love... all that is nothing.   ACIW p. 43
And two more freaking insane gems from this chapter/lesson:
Consciously, you feel like Thin You is the real you, while Not-Thin you is the imposter; but subconsciously, you feel like Not-Thin You is the real you, and Thin You is the imposter.    ACIW p. 46
... [I]n keeping her out of your heart, youve kept her on your body.   ACIW p. 47
Just let those rip through your system for a moment.  (Pause).
OK, now to proceed!

I fulfilled the lesson, writing two letters.  The first, not surprisingly, had the message that it's getting hard to get around, I don't want to feel this way, and that the way the fat seems to keep adding on is one of my few experiences of true abundance.  (Interesting, that!)

The letter back was... we'll just say... pointed.

You NEED ME.  I have so much to give you that you have been unable to receive.  How can you let me in?  Daily breaks.  (Some notes about my yoga practice and teacher.)  I want massages and acupuncture and therapy.  I want a pre-meal embrace and ritual.  I want a break at 10:30 EVERY day.  Don't f*cking stuff me away with food anymore.  And if you're having a second drink (or, especially, a third, or a fourth), I'm being shut out.
A little later, this:
I WILL be heard I WILL be felt even if I have to drag you kicking and screaming I will be heard.
Whoa!  She's a strong and feisty one.
I will make you famous.  I am your gift to share with the world.  Use my programs and I'll start to shapeshift for you.

So that said, I'm starting work on an online yoga program for managing the nervous system.  Starting to shoot videos even at my current weight.  I'm hoping to launch something (fantastic) by the end of the year!

That said, it's getting on near 10:30 in the morning and this lady needs her break.  Try writing a letter to your Not-Thin self.  You might be surprised what you hear back!